Howdy from Havana ,Illinois.

Since my Dad's brother passed away and I still have issues with  my own Dad's death I might as well just vent the grief off now and just reflect on my Dad's while i'm at it to prevent blow ups plus just to get shit off my chest.  My dad died a decade ago back in November 2007. It wasn't a pleasant sight to see him waste away nor was the last days pleasant.  I can't imagine how he felt but I take comfort in the fact he was probably so doped up on Morphine and ativan he probably didn't know what was going on or felt much atleast I hope anyway. In life comes death and everyone eventually deals with it and faces it themselves. Some people can handle it in a healthy manner while others like myself not so much. When Shaun and I  was dating Dad's breathing got worse and he went to the ER for  pain and breathing problems. They do Xrays and such and he was diagnosed with Lung Cancer which over the next few weeks we would  find out it was stage 4 an

I am in a state of different emotions and also a sense of  I can't do anything which I hate.  It takes me back to how I felt when dad died in a way.  My cousin Shawn informs me that my Uncle Jim had just passed away.  He had been in rough health for years and wasn't doing that good when I talked to Aunt Gladys back in either November or December 2017.  It's been a while I know. I suck at keeping in touch with people due to anxiety problems and my mental bullshit.  I'll avoid phone calls if I can.  I had planned on going to see them but the past few month marital problems and divorce talks and fights was a disasterous distraction.  We decided to try to work it out but man now I'm kicking myself in the ass for letting my anxiety and personal problems get in the way.  So I feel some guilt. I'll deal with it this shit isn't even important now. The fact he died and I can't get a hold of my aunt due to not having minutes on my phone and my gas t

Probably doesn't need to be a blog post about this considering I've ranted about the line before but I don't  remember if I  posted before and after on the line when BNSF stored cars on a section of this line between Canton and Dunfermline.  I am speaking ofcourse about the BNSF Yates City Sub or what used to be it.  From the Duck Creek Power Plant down where the sub runs into a mainline it is still active.  North of the line it is no longer in use most of which from Canton to Farmington was torn out last year.  It was a sad blow to the town historical wise but not a shock since there has been talks of the line being torn out someday even back in the late 1990's here say from my Dad and other's around town. Eventually it was doomed like many things in Canton as well as hopes and dreams. It's hardly the worst thing to happen to the town but it doesn't help we are dead industrial wise. If there is no industry there is no need for the line as much

This morning heard a westbound KJRY horn and look out the window to see them off in the distance entering Canton on the east end.  My  husband makes a smart ass comment and I exchanged one back  like the smart ass that I am. I go film the train at Fifth Avenue and they stop. I smirked a little as I seen they were going to retrieve a car from the siding off Second Avenue and Railroad Street. I love when the impatient drivers in this town have to wait.  They treat that road like a race track sometimes. I head down Railroad Street and film them pick up a car and take some photo's of them recoupling to load then departing west.  Hopefully in the coming months Hitchcock Scrapyard starts building something and start using rail service in this area.  Being I lived in Canton for so long and they aren't really known for progress so I'll believe it when I start seeing it. The skeptic in me  has to see something before it dawns on me something is really happening. Atleast

I miss when back in the day tv shows that made you laugh actually did so and were unapologetic about it unlike today's slop.  It was a different time and people were able to laugh at themselves and at other people without worrying about someone starting a protest in rage or throwing a shit fit over what is funny or what isn't.  We were laughing at characters on tv and the jokes not at an individual race or gender in itself. We weren't taking things seriously and just took light of stuff and had fun.  Now a days people are afraid to make jokes because you'll always have that one party pooper who will come up  and raise a ruckus because they lack a sense of humor. We also didn't get upset over words or wanted everything to be sugar coated where everything was all sunshine and rainbows. We laughed just because  things were silly, stupid and sometimes offensive like sex jokes or whatever. The 90's was a time to shine in the comedy department because y

In America today if you support a certain party today to which  the president is a part of people will cry, bicker and accuse you of everything in the book. They will call you hateful, a biggot and everything they can think of to further whatever their  agenda is or if they got their feelings hurt. This particular  side tends to protest alot, wear silly hats to grab attention and some of the more insane ones even wish harm on the president.  We all have seen it one time or another on some social media platform.  I am here to say this  Donald Trump is your president and I thought some of you were moving to Canada if he was elected.  Why are you still here?  Why say something then not keep your word?  Attention seeking? All about the dramatic to get your anger and your disappointment across. I am talking about the more dramatic ones who make bold statements. It's fine if you have a specific party you follow to each their own but  to some of these people what change d

I want a blog where it actually engages people to read and actually converse between blogger and reader instead of this talking to myself  routine I always do.  This will always still have content about railroads, railfan adventures and  history as well but I want to spice this up some.  I want to actually encourage conversation good or bad.  If there is something to debate then debate we shall. I had been trying to keep politics, religion and anything that might stir a  potential shit storm from brewing but if I did that I would just be another boring blogger so here is what I'm going to  do I'm just going to blog about whatever I am feeling if people like it or not.  Hopefully people will start commenting.   This will be expanded more to other topics as well as what is going on with me or just the world entirely if I feel the need to express an opinion or share personal experiences.  If I do ruffle some feathers then so be it.  I also want to speak real  talk

A westbound Keokuk Junction Railway train put an end to my train dought and some boredom. I hear the train from my apartment so I drive down to Fifth Avenue and take some pictures as I already have several videos from  and wanted pictures there. I drive west of town to film the train. Despite dreary a little it was rather warm out which was a nice break from those temperatures a week or so back.  God, I hate winter. Anyway the Line up was the F's and a Geep Prex #1752-1761-1750-2003. This sort of cheered me up a little from major depression and the fighting that's been going  on between my husband and I.  I know when I get pair the alternator on that car needs replaces.  The car is the gift that keeps on  giving...Oh joy needs more work done...Horrah!  Okay I'm done being silly and trying to use my weird humor to mentally cope with everything. I wish KJRY ran through here more than one full run a week.  This area is dead rail wise other than that and sometime